You can go to jail in Florida for buying a hearing aide online. How do I know this obscure and weird piece of information, one might ask? circuitous research that has oddly led me to pass on some very helpful information to other people–so, why not pass this information on, on The Newburyport Blog?

Behind the ear hearing aids are becoming stylish and are the size of a dime.

Back in my 30’s (oh, so long ago) I was told that I had some hearing loss. I was told this along the way by an astute physician. I did nothing for decades. And yes, eventually it became obvious that something needed to be looked into.

Very short version. If you go to an audiologist, hearing aids (and yes, those of us who are “younger” sometimes need them) can cost between $4,000-$6,000 and up for a pair. And insurance doesn’t pay for them. Whoowza. The price of a number of brand spanking new laptops or a used car. Good grief.

However, several things have conspired to help those whom, “You’ve gotta be kidding,” is their fist and final remark.

First, the internet happened. Second, the FDA did something (which I really don’t understand) that makes it possible to sell hearing aids through folks other than audiologists. Third, some very bright young men were horrified that either their family members or patients were forced to do without, or take out a loan to buy hearing aids, and they went and did something about it (creating hearing aids that vary from $500 to $1,400 a pair). Fourth, Costco, of all places, has gotten into the business of selling hearing aids in bulk big time (for around $2,000 for a pair).

What I went looking for was a first step version of a hearing aid. The equivalent of going to CVS and buying a pair of reading glasses, before eventually making the big leap and going for the more expensive prescription version.

After copious amount of research I found a young Otolaryngologist (a hearing doctor) based in Chicago who was upset that so many of his patients couldn’t afford, and therefore didn’t get the hearing aids that they needed. Dr. Cherukuri came up with a generic, “one size fits most,” that are  apparently not cheap in quality, hearing aid for his patients and now for anyone who wants to buy them. MDHearingAids–starting at $360 a pair to $600 a pair to $1,000 a pair, with a 45 day trial period. Unbelievable rave reviews. Sounded good to me.

Reading a New York Times article on this same dilemma, I found out about Audicus. You send in a copy of your hearing test, that insurance does pay for, and then they customize your hearing aide to fit the prescription, and then mail it to you for $1,200-$1,300-$1,400 a pair, with a 45 day trial period. They are also trying to take away the stigma of having a hearing aid by making them look sexier (not your grandpa’s hearing aid any more).

And then there is Costco, rave review everywhere. They do the hearing test right there, they work with major hearing aid manufactures, they have their own line, and pair goes for around $2,000, with a 90 day trial period.

And you can imagine that audiologists all over the place are having a fit about this. And that’s how I found out that some are having such a fit that in a state like Florida, buying a hearing aid online is a second degree misdemeanor and you can get up to 6 months in jail (although apparently that has never happened to anyone). Who knew that the editor of The Newburyport Blog would discover such an amazing tidbit of information. It makes me wish that I had the talents of someone like Carl Hiaasen because, Whowza, what a fun satire on all sorts of things someone could make out of that small little soupcon of information.